When I last posted, we were asking some questions (re: house rules, etc) that we felt we needed answered right away. Wrong! Those answers will come, but not before we get a whole lot of other questions out of the way.
Our new daily schedule
Life does not stop when you have a crisis situation in your home. Meals need to be planned and made, shopping needs to be done, house needs to be kept up, other kids need to be paid attention to. Many nights I have gone to bed exhausted, but unable to sleep. I wake up early and face the dawn telling myself “God has given me everything I need to face this day”. And He has and I do, usually.
School was looming. And teenager activities were beckoning. We did need to decide how much leeway to give her based on the little we knew. I kept getting clues though. She tries to act like a teenager, but I see, several times a day, her real self – for lack of better words. She reminded me of my 10 year olds. Based on how we got to this hard place, bad teenage choices, we decided that she might not have the mental capability to make choices of more than a 10 year old. We opted to go from that standpoint. We only give her the freedom we would give a 10 year old. She has settled right down and seems to feel safe most of the time. No struggles whatsoever against the rules that apply for that age. Thank goodness.
So what about School?
We did not feel home schooling was a good option (due to some logistics in our neighborhood and activities she was already involved in at school). We cannot afford private schooling, but rode the fence almost up to the week before school before we decided. Then a good friend of mine told us she had just gotten a job transfer to my daughter’s school and we felt based on this and other relationships already established there with adults, she would be cared for. We sent her back. That too seems to be going well.
One Other thing…
We knew that staying busy would help her right now, not overwhelming but doing what she loves. Her self esteem is very low and she is depressed. So we set her back up in horseback riding (for free from a great family who has a heart for kiddos like her) and continued on with Taekwondo. She seems more content. We have also started some counseling with the local mental health clinic. And are continuing on the road to determine what (other than the obvious) may be causing these delays.
Plus, with school, I get a break now during the day and am sleeping better without the continuous stress for 15 hours a day. My husband notices my face seems more relaxed. I hope my attitude is too.
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