Family Strengthening

Matt & I decided to get into a program titled “Family Strengthening” provided by Washington State University (go Cougs!). Its focus is for kids age 10-14 and their parents. Since we have 3 (and one in crisis) in that age group, any help we could get we are taking. And the free part was added incentive.

We were skeptical on whether there would be anything we could use in our unique family. And our teens were less enthusiastic than that, to say the least! However, the very first week we learned something that has changed how we view our teens’ actions. Their brains are going through the same transition as it did when they were 2 years old – so we weren’t being mean when we said “you are acting just like a 2 year old”!

Let me see if I can explain. The parts of the brain that are developing , the generative part, interacts with the emotions and quickly overwhelms the frontal lobes – which possess  thoughtful, rational and conscience driven restraints  on behavior. The twist on all this is that the frontal lobes do not fully mature until early 20s. So guess what? Parents have no other option but to be their teens’ frontal lobes for a time. Whether you or your teens like it or not.

The good news is that this (as is all parenting) IS a gradual letting go as they and their brains mature. With most kiddos, this will be a learning from their mistakes experience. For my girl, it will involve that and learning skills that will help her stay safe because that development is hopefully only delayed. We have seen some progress with these skills, like calling us when she feels in over her head and can’t see a way out. We parents, the frontal lobes, will provide one.

So on we march on in this journey. With a few more tools in our bag.

As you browse around this site, we hope you’ll find some effective parenting skills that will work for your family. As far as our family goes, we believe  The Total Transformation Program is the one tool that’s had the biggest impact on our household, but you need to find out for yourself. Click here to try it free. For a limited time, you just order it and complete and return the enclosed Feedback Survey.

You might be wondering if I’m making money by promoting this program, and the answer is yes! If you buy it after visiting my website, I will earn a commission.  The truth is, I tried it and liked it so much, that I decided it would be something I would feel proud to support and promote, and as a bonus, I get a commission if you buy it.

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